How can we change this cold-call email?

As you know, good communication is at the heart of what I do. I want businesses to relate more and engage with their prospects and customers.
Today, I want to talk to you about relating to prospects. I received this email yesterday and I put my head in my hands and shook my head. This person has spent time (not money!) on this email and hoped to get a response. And he may had one…but with a few tweaks, he could have easily got a much higher response rate.
I need your help – but first here is the email (names have been changed to preserve dignity!)
Subject line: XX Company/ meeting request
Hi Denise,
I have recently taken over the XX Company and would like to meet with you to discuss your plans for the next 12 months and explore whether we can be of assistance to Achieve Marketing.
We have been providing Computer Services & Support to small & medium sized companies for over 10 years. We specialise in ensuring technology is supporting client’s businesses and ensure value for money by providing cost effective support services.
We have just launched an “xx Helpdesk” Service, which I think will be of interest to you.
If you are free, I would like to suggest this coming Thursday @ 09:30 in your office. Alternatively, please let me know when you are available.
Gareth

I’ve written him a response – but would love to hear from other small business owners:
1. How would you respond to this email?
2. What changes could you suggest to him?
3. Anything else to add?
A rising tide raises all ships – so if we can help one another, then we’re all sure to growth and thrive.